Your actions created a ripple effect that forever changed the lives of many. Most importantly, mine and the lives of 2 young boys. You gave a gun to a man who you also gave drugs to. You hosted a deal that directly resulted in a police chase, gave a tool to someone not of sound mind to carry, and drugs to alter his state of mind. And in that state of mind, with a gun you provided, he shot and killed my husband, my person, my children’s father.
In what may have seemed like business as usual to a man like you in the drug business, your part led to a few seconds that dramatically changed the future of our family. Those moments stole a lifetime of a marriage I had with the man I love. The lifetime of a experiences, pivotal moments, future memories with a father my boys adored. We will never be the same. You robbed the world of a husband, the father of 2 children, a loyal friend, a cherished son, and a selfless man who served his community.
While you may not have pulled the trigger, you created an opportunity where there was a trigger to be pulled simply because Jake was doing his job, to protect and serve a community that included you and your family and loved ones. He took an oath to protect you and this community without judgement, regardless of your illegal decisions, and your lack of humanity and inconsequential regard for the way you lived your life which in turn stole Jake’s future, my future, and my children’s future.
And while we continue to move forward, we will never be past it. Even almost 2 years out, my boys continue to process more and more of what this means to have lost their Daddy. They think of things like, “He shouldn’t have gone to work that day.” And days where our conversations begin with “I can’t stop thinking of Daddy. I am so so so angry that someone killed him and he died.”
Your actions are not inconsequential. They are not minor drug and firearm charges. Your actions directly resulted in the senseless death of man who frankly should still be here. I hope you see that. I hope you think about that. Because not a moment goes by where we are not haunted by the loss of Jake.